Title: The Joe and Billy Show

Author: redrush.

Rating: NC-17. (lots of hot, dirty, unholy monkey sex.)

Genre: Slash and Het, M/M, M/F.

Pairing: Joe/Billy, Joe/Female, Billy/Female.

Teaser: A fan of the Hard Cores catches a show on the reunion tour and reminisces.

Disclaimer: They are not mine, don't own them. Never will.

Feedback's almost as good as being in a Hugh and Callum sandwich.


I stepped into the bar slowly. The smoky air choked me and the thought flickered through the back of my head that I was getting too old for this. The only reason I was here was just to check, just to see if this really was them. Hard Core Logo, really it always was The Joe and Billy Show all that aside I wanted to see if Joe Dick was still alive. Fucker.

I stepped up to the bar and ordered a beer. The house lights went down and the crowd in the bar swooped forward to the stage. I paid for my beer but didn't join the throng down in front. I choked on my first swig when I saw Joe. God he hadn't changed one bit. It was going on ten years at least since I last saw them and Billy looked good. He always did. He looks so removed from John, Joe and Pipe. Remember that old song about one of these things is not like the others? Billy was always THAT one.

Joe started screaming about something and Billy began playing and the volume assaulted my ears. No longer used to the punk lifestyle I've become accustomed to stuffy elevator music in my cushy corporate life and I wince slightly and my younger self is laughing at me.

I follow the laughter and see myself at the front of the stage, my hair longer, my clothes tighter and more revealing. Joe is still screaming and Billy is wandering around the stage; both are younger and a little less haunted. I was never the groupie kind it was always about the music. Really, honestly. I would just go to the front and let the rush and heat of the music run over me and pull me away from my life.

I was just old enough to drink legally and I had just gotten an apartment on my own with a nice weekly allowance from Daddy that let me work when I felt like it. Fuck the symphony. I wanted to get in on what normal, average people my age were into. I wanted a life outside of the claustrophobically affluent social circles my parents had raised me in.

I wanted to break the rules and for me at that point breaking rules were staying out past curfew and letting a guy go up my shirt. God how na´ve can a girl be. So I had a dumpy apartment a block from this bar. The word had been buzzing for a few weeks that the Hard Core Logos would be playing. So I made it a point to go.

I had nice buzz going when I got to the bar. It was really filling up so I got another beer and pushed my way down to the stage off to the right side. I still didn't quite have a handle on the clothing aspect of the punk scene but I made due with tight faded-ripped-in-all-the-right-places blue jeans and a sleeveless blue flannel shirt unbuttoned far enough to see I wasn't wearing a bra.

Looking back now I realize I was asking for it, the clothes, and the booze. Shaken from the past I took another drink of my beer and study Joe on stage. He throws his head back and spits it's so much like ten years ago.

"Hey fuckheads!" A tall man with a mohawk calls out strutting across the stage with a skinny blonde guy at his hip. The singer instantly mesmerizes me and I laugh to myself talk about a complete opposite of my country club lifestyle. They begin playing a loud throbbing beat with a screaming peal from the skinny blonde's guitar in front of me. I chug my beer and close my eyes letting the music erase my thoughts and move my body.

Wrapped up in the music I don't notice the crush of people advancing the stage. I finish my beer and put the bottle on the floor and realize I can't move back any longer. The stage is about four feet up off the ground and the people are moving forward lunging toward the charismatic singer and I'm pretty much pinned to the stage. In my inebriated state I began having trouble breathing in the crush. The blonde must have realized my distress cause I hear him screaming, "Back the fuck off!"

It doesn't seem to help and if anything people are getting wilder and a few others are becoming trapped in my predicament. I took huge gulping breaths and felt myself falling to the floor. That's when someone grabbed my arms and bodily dragged me up and on stage. It was the blonde guitar player, the show was still going on around me and I was disoriented. He shook me a few times and asked if I was all right.

I can't remember much after that. I remember some guy handing me another beer trying to wake me up. I was slouched back on a filthy, stinking couch and I took the beer and drank greedily. I sat up and found I could breath again without a problem I was still dizzy but I suspected it was more from the alcohol.

The guy with the beer stood and walked to the other side of the small room. "Hey Joe! Billy! She's ok, she's awake."

I remember trying to stand up from that filthy couch. The smell made me want to vomit and I wanted to get home. I bit my lip so I wouldn't cry. I fell back on the couch.

"You need a doctor, honey?" The mohawk asked cigarette dangling from the corner of his mouth. I shook my head and he offered his hand to help me up.

"She's really ok, Joe? Christ, I hope she isn't gonna sue us." The skinny blonde sidled up to the mohawk.

"Fuck Billiam, she's a kid. Besides I'm sure we could come up with some kind of arrangement if she feels it's necessary." Joe licked his lips and ran a hand over my arm.

Ok, now I'm scared. So much for Miss Grown-Up Independent. The small room is emptying and I see the other guys packing up instruments. I pull my arm away and try to smile steadily. "I'm fine. No harm done."

"Not yet." Joe smiled wickedly. Billy elbowed him in the gut.

"Not tonight Joe, Christ."

"Fuck off Billiam." Joe turned and shoved Billy hard. Then he landed a punch to his nose. Billy grabbed a handful of hair and yanked Joe hard and he slammed into the wall.

Joe grabbed Billy by the shirt and shoved him back up against the wall and licked the blood trailing from Billy's nose. "Sometimes a guy needs a little pussy. Not that you don't take good care of me, baby."

My eyebrows climbed my forehead. Shit damn. Joe's tongue came out and licked the little trail of blood on Billy's face and then I heard Joe call him baby. The sight of them kissing surprisingly did not disgust me, fucking hell it turned me on something fierce. My knees went out again and I fell back on the couch. Billy's tongue slipped into Joe's mouth and my underwear was wet.

A cymbal crashed and the moment was broken. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I stood once again and Joe and Billy were eyeing me like the last drink of water in the desert.

"Thanks guys." I gave a half wave and began walking out towards the bar.

"Wait a sec, honey." Joe called. "We're playing tomorrow night, come back we'll put your name on the list. After all you didn't see much of the show tonight."

"Ok, thanks I'm Natalie." I smiled and turned to walk away.

"How're you getting home, Natalie?" Billy called.

"Ah, walking. It's a few blocks." I nervously smiled as the pair advanced on me.

"Well it's pretty late, we should see you home. I mean after all we wouldn't want anything to happen to you." Billy slipped an arm around my waist.

"Yeah, our fans are very important to us." Joe lit another cigarette and followed us as Billy led me out of the bar.

"Well I'm not exactly a fan. I just heard about the show and decided to check it out." I suddenly sobered up and started to panic as Joe came up on the other side of me and slipped an arm around my waist.

"You will be." Joe smiled and I couldn't help but shiver.

Billy nuzzled the side of my face and suckled on my earlobe causing me to falter in step as we walked. "It's cool, we won't hurt you. We just wanna have some fun."

Joe laughed at my misstep and held me tighter. We crossed two blocks and while waiting for some traffic at another corner Joe handed the bottle of Jack he'd been sucking down to Billy. Standing in front of me he kissed me full on the mouth. His tongue fluttered in my mouth against my teeth and tongue I had to grab onto his arms to stay standing. I vaguely heard Billy laughing between several gulps of the bottle in his hand.

Joe pulled away from the kiss he put his right hand between my legs and rubbed me hard he smiled as I moaned. He took the bottle back from Billy with a kiss and Billy nipped at his tongue laughing.

When we were in my apartment Joe and Billy pushed me up against the door. Joe began kissing my neck alternating with bites along my jaw and lips. Billy stood off to the side and lit a cigarette. He stepped closer and helped Joe take off his jacket. Billy slipped the cigarette into his mouth for a moment too.

"Thanks babe." Joe smiled and gave it back. Returning his glance to me he blew the smoke out his nose and smiled like a Cheshire cat.

I couldn't help but smile. A dark shadow crossed my brain and suddenly I didn't care. 'Oh what the fuck. You wanted a new life and see how the other half lives. Here it is sweetheart, grab it by the balls and run with it. Hell how often does a girl get it while the guy's boyfriend is watching?' Soon I was laughing after listening to my inner voice.

"What's so fuckin funny?" Joe asked laughing with me.

"If my mommy could see me now!" I smiled and snaked a hand around his neck and pulled him to me. Our teeth ground against each other and our tongues and lips were mashed between our faces.

'Ok so the boyfriend isn't going to watch' was the last coherent thought I had. Billy came up behind me running his hands up and down my legs. He pulled my hair up and licked the back of my neck half way around he met Joe's tongue on my shoulder and their intertwined their tongues and were kissing while rubbing against me.

Billy really wasn't what I wanted so I took advantage of their distraction and slowly sank to my knees. 'Ok Nat, let's not embarrass ourselves here.'

I pulled on the button and zipper of Joe's jeans. He was already erect and I had a hell of a time getting him out of his pants. Being completely inexperienced I just got down to business and started sucking Joe's cock. Trying to remember everything I'd read I pulled back and swirled my tongue around the tip of the weeping head making a slurping noise as I took in the salty fluid leaking out.

"Holy fuck." Joe hissed and he grabbed the back of my head. "Oh, Billy this cunt's good."

Billy laughed and went to my kitchen table and lit another cigarette. I pulled back and wiped my chin.

"What the hell?" Joe grabbed my wrist as I tried to stand.

"Fuck me." I said surprising myself as well as my guests.

"Ok honey I'm good to go. Why don't you give Billiam there a taste of what I just had first." Joe winked and ran a thumb over my nipple. The smooth flannel had a magnifying effect to his touch and I closed my eyes moaning.

Billy took my hand and led me to my bed in the other room. He smiled and sat on my bed. "Save your knees."

He picked at the buttons on my flannel exposing my breasts. He pulled me down to straddle his lap and buried his head in my chest licking and sucking the skin. He pulled the shirt the rest of the way off and ran his hands over my torso. I smiled and pushed him back to lie down.

He unbuttoned and unzipped his pants for me and slid up the bed a bit. I knelt over him and took him in my mouth repeating what I did to Joe. Joe had joined us at one point and was now sitting at the head of the bed smoking and stroking Billy's hair.

I took Billy all the way in and swallowed. He bucked his hips up and he came hard. I choked a bit but I was able to swallow most of what he gave me. I looked up and saw Billy and Joe's fingers tangled together in one hand. Joe put his cigarette out and motioned for me to come closer.

I obliged him and when I got as close as he needed he locked his lips over mine and proceeded to lick every trace of Billy out of my mouth. Billy had recovered and was busy trying to get my jeans off from underneath me. I could feel his breath on my crotch and soon I was wiggling working against his best effort to get me undressed.

Finally with my jeans off Billy started licking the wet spot in my underwear alternating with hot puffs of air and bites. Frozen on all fours over Billy's face I felt Joe get up and heard him rustling around the room. The feeling of Billy's mouth on me put my senses on overload. I couldn't hold myself up any longer and I collapsed on top of Billy.

He rolled out from underneath me and I could see Joe standing at the foot of the bed. Billy stood and kissed Joe hard and reached down with one hand and played with his erection. Joe threw his head back in ecstasy and I swear he almost purred.

Joe grunted and thrust his hips forward. With a sharp laugh he admonished Billy. "Cool it sweetheart, save some for our new friend here."

Joe got on the bed and crawled over me he dipped his head and bit my nipple hard. Then he licked it in a languid apology and I came hard.

As I came back to reality I was sober and decidedly not happy about what was happening. I grabbed Joe's arms and tried to push but he misunderstood my actions and suddenly I felt a searing pain in my stomach. I cried out but Joe only held me closer and thrust harder.

The pain subsided and I began to enjoy myself. Joe flipped us so I was on top of him. I started bouncing up and down on him and he grabbed my breasts, thumbing my nipples. Billy got back on the bed and alternately kissed Joe and myself as we fucked. Joe grabbed my hips and pulled me down hard as he came in me. He grunted like a pig and kicked his legs all the while holding me against him.

"Well, now that was fun, wasn't it Natalie?" Joe grinned and I rolled off him and lay down at the foot of the bed, satisfied but a little freaked. Billy came over and handed me a joint. I took a long drag and handed it back. Joe sat up and reached down drawing a hand between my legs.

He offered the wet fingers to Billy and he settled on the bed nursing Joe's fingers. I watched completely enraptured as they rolled on the bed, biting and hitting. It was so sexual, they weren't hurting each other and their moans and growing erections attested to that.

Joe was attacking Billy like nothing I'd ever seen. Joe was a blur of motion as every part of his body fought to touch Billy. Joe was rubbing his erection against Billy's thigh careful to avoid Billy's own throbbing cock. I could see it pulse and change colors and I felt sorry for him.

"Oh, God, fuck me Joe." Billy whimpered. Joe flipped him over violently and Billy began humping the sheets. Joe straddled his legs and motioned for me to come closer. I crawled across the bed and Joe grabbed me and kissed me hard. I couldn't help the moan that escaped my lips and I wound my arms around his neck. Joe put his right hand between my legs and started thrusting in and out with three fingers.

After a few minutes his thumb brushed against my clit and I had another orgasm. He waited until I stopped panting and then removed his hand. It was dripping with my juices and he wiped it over his cock and then Billy's ass. He pushed me away and I fell back next to Billy.

His eyes were closed but I heard him grunt when Joe entered him. Joe was thrusting hard and Billy's whole body moved on the bed every time Joe thrust home. I watched in complete fascination and when I reached out to touch Billy Joe screamed at me.

"Keep your hands off him cunt!"

It took me completely off guard. Billy was whimpering and grinding his hips against the bed. Joe reached down and grabbed a handful of Billy's hair. Joe bucked like he was going to come but Billy stopped him. He yelled when Joe pulled his hair and flipped over disengaging Joe.

Joe threw a punch and I fell off the bed. He made contact with Billy's thigh but Billy didn't flinch. He grabbed Joe's wrists and spread his legs with his knee. It looked painful from my perspective but Joe was just lying there with a smile on his face.

"So, you wanna get fucked Joe?" Billy spat angrily at him. "You wanna get fucked? Billy's your little slut, at your fucking beck and call, Dick."

Joe laughed at Billy. The change in Billy was so dramatic I got scared. Billy was panting and his eyes desperately searched the room for something. He released Joe and got off the bed. Joe went to sit up but Billy stopped him. "Lay the fuck down Joe. It's my turn to have a little fun. You may run the band and the whole fucking world but tonight I'm running the party."

This made Joe take a second look. He complied with Billy and sat quietly. Billy pulled a scarf and two bandanas hanging from my dresser. Joe relaxed and smiled appreciatively. He rubbed his palms together and Billy took advantage grabbing his left wrist and tied one of the bandanas around it. He tied the other one as well. Then he tied each of them to the bedpost.

Billy smiled down at Joe and kissed him gently on the lips. Joe bucked his hips his erection bobbing painfully against his stomach. Billy ran his hand down Joe's chest and gently caressed his stomach. He stopped just shy of his dick and crawled down and blew on the head. Joe screamed in frustration and bucked. Billy laughed.

"Don't worry Dick, your little slut will make sure you get it good."

Billy grabbed Joe's ankles and tied them together with the scarf. Billy laughed and reached for me. He helped me off the floor and held me whispering so Joe wouldn't hear he said, "I hope I didn't scare you. I love Joe but he's fucking cunt sometimes."

I smiled and he kissed me gently. Billy whispered, "It's time he's learned his lesson."

He pulled me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. I could feel his erection and I began rubbing against it. He almost dropped me and I laughed. He kissed me again hard this time his tongue invaded my mouth.

"What the fuck, Billiam?" Joe screamed and struggled against his bonds. "Jesus fucking H. Christ."

Billy put me down and grabbed a blanket laying it on the floor. He helped me lie down on it and smiled at me lightly kissing and sucking my breasts. I ran my fingers through his hair and cradled his head.

"Billy you fucking slut, what the hell are you doing? Get over here and sit on my fucking cock." Joe yelled again.

I grabbed Billy and slid him inside me giving a happy little sigh. He nuzzled my neck and started thrusting into me slowly and gently. We kissed and touched slowly making love not a fast primal fuck.

Joe was lying on the bed seething and screaming at Billy. This only served Billy to go slower and drive me out of my mind. He kissed the bruise on my nipple that Joe had made and rested his head in my neck. He thrust one last time and I felt him come. Our bodies shook as they released together. We kissed softly and for good measure I ran my hands up and down Billy's back and softly massaged his ass and gently ground my hips with him still inside me.

Billy mewled like a kitten and Joe let out a painful howl. I looked over and watched Joe writhe as his cock spurt all over his belly.

"I swear to fucking God Billy I will kill you."

Billy laughed against my breasts and started rocking inside me again. I locked my legs around his back and we did it again. This time I didn't get off but it felt so good to have Billy in me and have our bodies slip and slide together. I could understand why Joe was so angry; Billy was so very good at this.

When Billy was finished he covered me with the blanket and went to the bed. He ran his tongue through the cold semen on Joe's stomach and placed a wet kiss on the end of Joe's dick. It was still half hard but it jumped when Billy's lips brushed against it. Joe bucked his hips and came again this time hitting Billy on the chin. Billy licked it up and untied Joe.

Joe leapt off the bed and started his fists flailing on Billy. It broke my heart to watch Billy take it but I knew he would. Then surprising both Joe and I, Billy threw a sucker punch to Joe's gut. Joe stumbled back.

"Fuck you, Joe. Fuck you."

Joe picked up his clothes and dressed quickly. He lit a cigarette and stared at Billy. "It'll always be you and me, babe. Always."

He walked out of my bedroom. "Thanks for the ride sweetheart."

I smiled and got up off the floor. Suddenly I was a bit embarrassed being naked and pulled the blanket around me. Billy lit a cigarette and sat on the bed. He patted the spot next to him so I sat. He passed the cigarette to me.

"He really is a fucker but I love him. Been playing his fucked up games for too long now. Too late to quit." Billy laughed sadly. It struck me how old he looked for such a young man.

I handed him the cigarette and he stubbed it out on the floor. He got up and pulled the wet sheets off the bed and threw them on the floor. He motioned for me to lie down and we curled up together under the blanket.

Later that morning when I woke up Billy was going down on me and when he looked up I smiled at him and he slid inside. We had breakfast around noon and he kissed me good bye. I held the door for him as he left.

"See you tonight Natalie." And he did, I went back for the second show and for a few more before they broke up. Whenever they were in town Billy would stop by and spend the night. Joe never came with him again. We'd talk, fuck and I would listen to Billy play songs on his guitar. They were mournful and melancholy but they were Billy's and he didn't share them with Joe.

A man asking if he could by me a beer brought me back to the present a drink and I shook my head slightly. I smiled and nodded my head.

"It's good to see you again." He smiled and lit a cigarette with those long delicate fingers.

"Yeah, just thought I'd check up on someone I used to know." He smiled at me and handed me a beer.

"Was it worth it? I mean did you enjoy the show?"

I smiled and looked over at Joe fucking around with John. "Yeah, who wouldn't love the Joe and Billy show."

He followed my gaze and laughed slightly, cigarette dangling dangerously out of his mouth. "Fuck yeah."

"Well, thanks for the beer. Take care of yourself." I smiled at him. He stubbed out his cigarette and smiled drunkenly. He pulled me in for a hug and whispered in my ear.

"I think we both know I've never been good at that."

I sighed heavily knowing how true those words were. "Thanks Billy."

"Take care Nat." I left the bar and just for the hell of it drove by my old place. The building was gone and there was a strip mall in its place. I popped a tape in the stereo.

It was a bootleg of Jenifur live at Lollapalooza.

Some habits die hard.